Who are you? Sum yourself up in one sentence. I'm the best hog rider this side of
the galaxy or any galaxy, I can wrestle better than a cacklebrock in a nest full of
brussels, and I'm a mighty fine-looking gal, to boot.
Do you have any nicknames, street names, titles, or nom de plume? Do I! You
won't believe some of the plain awful things some folks call me when they think I ain't
listening. Eh, but besides that, I gots a few wrestling names I go by. And the Earth
people likes to call me Hogrider on account of my hog-riding.
What is your full birth name? *Mutters* Lulusciel Visconte.
Where do you live? Oh, any ole place will do.
How old are you? What year were you born (if applicable)? It's kind of hard to
keep track to tell ya the truth. Years are calculated differently on so many different
planets. Why, on one planet, I might well be five thousand years old! And gee, if that
don't seem like a loooong time. Ain't no way I've lived that long. In Harvon years, I'd
think I'd be about twenty-five now.
What is your gender? If not applicable, please explain. I'm all woman.
How would you describe your heritage? My heritage? Well, I'm a Harvoni, and I come
from a great, proud family. We're pretty well-respected in Harvoni circles, and that ain't
How tall are you? Uh, pretty tall, I guess. I've seen taller, but I've seen
What is your body type? Ummm... humanoid-looking?
Do you have any particular weaknesses, such as allergies or physical disabilities?
Can't say that I do. I'm as fit as a farfanna in a swamp tree.
How do you carry yourself? Are you graceful, or heavy on your feet? Can you be
stealthy, do you walk with confidence? I sure as Sanderstinkton ain't graceful,
that's for sure! Grace is for those pretty, pampered delicate types that wouldn't know how
to take a punch if it was coming right for them! I'm strong, and I act like it!
Describe your skin, eye, and hair color. What for?
How do you wear your hair, if applicable? Do you have facial hair? Facial hair?
Maybe some womenfolk take to that kind of thing, but it's not for me. I may be a strong
woman, but I'm not no man-woman.
Do you consider yourself attractive? Do others? I don't see why I wouldn't. Or why
anyone wouldn't. I'm a pretty gal as gals go.
Do you have any scars, tattoos, piercings, or birthmarks? Hehe. I ain't telling.
Do you resemble anyone famous? Nah. Not that I know of, anyway.
Do you have a dominant hand? Depends on whatcha mean. My left hand is my punching
hand, but I like to use my right hand when I'm eating or drinking.
What kind of clothing do you wear? Uh.. jacket, shorts, belt, boots, hat. I don't
get all fancy.
Do you wear makeup? Not really.
What is your vocal range? Is your voice distinctive in some way? My voice is my
voice. It sounds like me, and nobody else that I know.
Do you have any distinctive habits, nervous tics, or mannerisms? Where did they come
from, and what causes them? Do other people notice and remark on these habits? Do they
annoy you or other people? Nothing I've noticed.
Where do you come from? I was born on Harvon. That's where I came from before some
idiot botched up their science experiment and blackholed their planet and mine and our
entire star system with it!
Have you made any major moves, or do you live in your hometown? Gee, I moved around
so much when I was younger, it would give me headaches something awful. Sometimes, I
wanted to stay; sometimes, I wanted to go. But I never had my own choice. Not until now.
Now, I can go where I want when I want. That's just the way I likes it.
Do you feel loyal to your country of citizenship? Do you consider yourself patriotic?
How do you feel about the government of your country? I probably would if it wasn't
all down the hole.
How do you feel about the place you come from? Ain't much to feel about something
gone, is there? I miss it. What more do you want to know?
Where is your home town? What was/is it like? You really pushing things something
fierce, you know that?
Growing up, were most of the people you knew similar to you, or were you somehow a
minority? How did that affect you? Well, I was after everyone had to haul kiester out
of our star system. It wasn't pretty being a Harvoni on planet after planet of strangers.
My first boyfriend was a worm! And I ain't mean that all metaphorical-like, but I mean a
real worm with segments and everything. We kinda stuck together on account of the fact
that he, I think it was a he, I'm not all too sure now come to think of it... But he
wasn't none too popular in school. We dated for a while, but then he broke up with me,
telling me that I just didn't have enough of them there pretty segments his people liked
so much, and it would never work out. And it was something awful because I had to go to
the dance all by myself that year. And don't get me started about my first school year on
the planet whose name I can't even pronounce!
Is there something you've always been really good at or really bad at? How has that
affected your life? Doesn't everybody have something they're really good at or really
bad at? Can't say its affected me all that much. Long as you know what you're good at and
you stick to it, you can't go wrong.
Were there any traumatic experiences in your early years (death of a family member,
abandonment, orphaned at an early age)? My planet done got sucked into a blackhole.
I'd count that as traumatic.
Briefly describe a defining moment in your childhood and how it influenced your life.
I think I've made it pretty darned clear what the defining moment of my childhood
What stupid things did you do when you were younger? Aw, gee, I've probably done
more stupid things than there are stars in space! There was that time when I was younger I
chased a farfanna up a swamp tree and got stuck, that time I went into a bugaboo cavern
and nearly got my head plum-eaten off, that time I chased a wabtail down a hole and got
stuck and had to have my brothers dig me out because I didn't want Ma and Pa finding out
but that darn Bobbi told me on anyway, that time I... *Several hours later* ... And boy,
was I embarrassed! Shoot, I could tell you so many stories, I hardly gots time for them
Where did you go to school? How much school did you have, and did you enjoy it?
Where didn't I go to school? I think I must've been at least to ten different ones. I got
out as soon as I could. I never much liked school. Always making you sit down and read
books that ain't make no kind of sense and write things and numbers and whatever else they
make you write in school. And to top it all off, none of the teachers liked me. "Sit
down!" they said. "Don't punch that kid in the face!" they said. "Lulu, put that down!"
"Don't eat that!" *Makes strange clicking noises* I don't even know what that last one
meant! School is plum ridiculous, I tells you, and that ain't no lie.
Do you have any mementos of your childhood? What are they, and why did you keep them?
If you have none, why not? You mean those things you suck on to make your breath all
fresh and smelling good? I don't rightly know why someone would keep them around when they
can use them up right then and there.
When did you decide to become a hero? Why? Did anyone influence you one way or another
in the decision? Well, after I broke up with my ex, I went to stay with my family and
do some serious thinking. I mean, really serious. I must have thunk harder than I ever
have in my whole life, and that sure as Sanderstinkton ain't no lie. And I said to myself,
"Lulu, is this what you really want for yourself? Causing trouble everywhere you go and
making everyone around you miserable and being chased all around the galaxy by people who
hate your guts?" And when I looked at it that way, I was like... "Gee, that sounds mighty
awful, Lulu. Why for everything good and Harvoni would you want THAT for yourself?" And so
I decided right then and there, I was going to change my ways. No more trouble-making.
From now on, it's the straight and narrow all the way. No ifs, ands, or buts.
Is the reason you give people for becoming a hero different than your real reason? If
so, why? Why would it be different? I mean, not that I'm saying I don't lie, but that
seems like something awfully stupid to lie about.
Do you have any deep, dark secrets in the past that may come back to haunt you?
Secrets? Nah. My ex-boyfriend is pretty deep and dark and tends to haunt me, though. So, I
worry about that, sometimes.
Do you represent yourself as being different from who you really are? Why? Why
would I be different than who I am? Ain't nobody I'd rather be than me.
If you do have these secrets, what do you fear would happen if the truth became known?
How far would you go to protect those secrets? I'm not really much into secret-
keeping. Even when I was a trouble-maker, I tended to kinda brag.
Do you have any sort of criminal record? If so, is it public knowledge? Ooooh!
Look, I went to trial, I did my community service, I'm doing good now, I slipped up that
one time in the Juanti sector after drinking a little too much, but they dropped the
charges and everything is FINE, SO JUST DROP IT, okay?! I'm an upstanding sentient
creature of the universe now!
What are your biological parents' names? I always just call them Ma and Pa.
Were you raised by them? If not, please explain and describe who raised you. I
don't know why I'd be raised by anyone else. My Ma and Pa are good people, and that ain't
What was their standing in the community? What did/do they do for a living? Like I
said, they're pretty well-respected in Harvoni circles. Can't say we got the same respect
everywhere else, though. My Pa is a space transport salesman, and my Ma's a cook. Mighty
good cook, too.
Where are your parents now? I think they're settled somewhere in the Lor Republic
right now. They move around a lot.
Did your family stay in one area or move around a lot? The second one. You got
goshinfluff in your ear-holes?!
How did you get along with their parents? How do you get along with them now (if
applicable). I'm pretty close to my Nana. She's the only one who didn't make me want
to strangle a daggard to the popping point when I was younger.
How do your parents view you now, or how would they? I think Ma and Pa are mighty
relieved that I broke up with my boyfriend and that I'm trying to turn my life around.
They still don't really approve of my hog-racing, but they've shut up about it at the
family reunions and holidays, so that's an improvement.
Do you have any siblings? If so how many and what are their names? Describe your
relationship with them. I've got five siblings. There's my two older brothers, Bobbi
and Blur, my twin brother Lou, my younger brother Eli, and my younger sister Bebe. I don't
got a bad relationship with any of them. 'Course, sometimes, Bobbi can get on my nerves
because he always acts like he's so perfect. And then Lou acts a lot like me, but that can
be a bad thing, especially when we start hog-racing one another.
What was your birth order in the family? I'm the third/fourth (depending on how you
looks at it) of six.
Where are your siblings now (if applicable)? Do they have families of their own? What
do they do? My brother Bobbi is some kinda high-class diplomat now, got a gorgeous
family, making good money, can't spare a parasec to talk to the people he grew up with
unless it's to talk about how perfect his life is without us. *Grumbles*
Blur is obsessed with blackholes, and he got's some kind of fancy-pants science degree,
but he doesn't rub it in anyone's face like Bobbi, so he's all right. He ain't married
yet, and a lot of us are wondering if he'll ever be married.
My twin brother Lou is a professional hog-racer, and he's still chasing a lot of pretty
women and drinking a lot, and no one is sure if he'll EVER settle down.
Eli's living a simple farming kind of life. He's engaged to some kind of alien lady I
can't remember the name of, but he's absolutely head over heels for her. I hear they ain't
biowhatsit compatible, but they said they're thinking of adopting. Pa is starting to
grudgingly accept their relationship, but it's taking him a while. Nana is being awfully
persuasive to get him to accept it. The rest of us are just happy he's found him some
Bebe's got four kids and another one on the way. We still don't know who any of the
Do you stay in touch with them or have you become estranged? I try to stay in
touch. I go to all our family reunions and such. Just wouldn't be Harvoni if I did
Do you love or hate one member of the family in particular? I'm pretty close to my
Nana. I don't hates anyone in my family, even if some of them do drive me up a swamp tree.
Is any member of the family special to you in any way (perhaps, as a confidant, mentor,
or arch-rival)? My Nana's always been there for me if I need to talk.
Are there any black (or white) sheep in the family (including you)? If so, please
explain. Sheep? What in tardriftan is a sheep? I don't think we got any of those in my
Do you have a notorious or celebrated ancestor? If so, please explain, including how it
has affected your life. I got all sorts of interesting ancestors! I'd be here all day
telling you stories, though.
Do you have a partner and children currently? If so, please describe them. Nope.
If you do not have a partner or children, do you want them someday? How firm are you in
your opinion on this, and what might change your mind? Oh, I hope so! I think the
universe could benefit from the pitter-patter of little Lulu feet. Hehe.
What type of person would be your ideal mate? Oh, I dunno... Someone that ain't my
ex-boyfriend, that's for sure.
Do you have any close friends? If so, please describe them, and how you came to be
close to them. There's this gal I sit next to at my favorite space bar and grill. She
ain't talk any, but she sure as does listen to what I have to say, and she's never said a
mean word to me or got up and left, so I guess she counts.
Do you have a best friend? If so, how did they become your best friend? How close are
you to your best friend? I'd say my Nana is probably the closest to a best friend I've
If you were to go missing, who would worry about you? Oh, my family would turn the
universe upside-down looking for me, I bet. We stick together, and that ain't no lie.
Have you lost any loves? If so, how did it happen, and what did you do? Why you
assuming it was all me that did anything? It might have took me a while to realize it, but
that son-of-a-belcorn was no good for me. He's no good for anyone. You wouldn't believe
the things he talked me into doing with his sweet honey words and his grubby paws. Well,
Lulu ain't nobody's fool, least not for very long. I stood up for myself and I kicked his
kiester out the door. Er... kinda. But anyway, it's none of your business what happened,
and that's all I'm gonna say.
Do you have any bitter enemies? If so, please describe them and their history with
you. Your ear-holes have gotta be full of the biggest pieces of goshinfluff in the
whole universe, you know that? I just told you about my ex, didn't I? He's an enemy if I
ever saw one.
If you have enemies, how do you think they might attempt to work against you in the
future? If I ain't trolleyed on the hows. My ex might be an evil son-of-a-belcorn, but
he's as far from stupid as you can get. There's no telling what kind of things are going
on in that messed up head of his.
What is the worst thing someone has done to you? Played with my heart, but that
thing can be a ticking time bomb. You play with MY heart, and I'm gonna explode at you,
and that ain't no lie.
Where do your loyalties lie? In what order? My hog is my life. Ain't nothing better
than me, my hog, and the wide open space. Next to that, there's my family... and, uh, a
few special drinks. And the principle things of goodness and justice and stuff, I guess.
Who or what do you trust the most? Why? My Nana ain't never given me a bum steer. I
also trust my hog because there ain't nothing I can't accomplish without it.
Who or what do you despise? Why? My ex, school, fancypants snobs with their noses
so high in the air they'd drown as soon as it rained, and don't you dare make me eat any
spinbagus because that stuff is nasty.
What qualities do you admire most in other people? Are these qualities you possess?
I like people who speak their mind, who follow their dreams, and never give up. Hard-
working folk are also good in my book.
What qualities do you hate most in other people? Do you have any of those qualities?
People who say one thing but mean something else, people that lie through their teeth
or pretend they care about you, but then stab you in the back.
Do you have a secret identity? If so, who knows it? Do you hide it from people who are
close to you? Why? What would I want one of those for? Way I see it, it's near
impossible to hide who you are.
Do you work well on teams and in groups? Are you a leader or a follower? Never
tried working on a team before; I'm used to going it solo. I like being my own boss. But
to tell the truth, it's kinda lonely.
Are you on a super team? If so, how do you get along with your comrades? Do you trust
them, or do you have secrets from them? A super team? Gee, that sounds super. How do
you think I could go about getting me on one of them there super teams?
Are you a member of any church, fraternal organization, club, committee, political
party, or other group? How much time do you spend on that? I don't really get into all
that political-type stuff. I'm a simple gal. I'm a member of the Hogracers Association,
and I'm known throughout a couple of galaxies as a decent wrestler.
Personality & Beliefs
Who are your heroes? Guess I never really thought about that none. My Nana isn't
strong and her hips give her some problems, but when it comes to right and goodness, well,
my Nana might well be the best hero there is.
Did you ever become disillusioned with former heroes or idols? If so, why and what were
the circumstances? Haven't had too many honestly. I've told you about my Nana. And
then, there's Boss Sanderstinkton, the Hero of the Harvoni people. Way back when, Harvon
done near got itself invaded, but Boss Sanderstinkton led our people in the fight against
them, and we won. He also led a lot of them there diplomacy type deals, and we didn't get
that much flack from our neighbors in our star system much ever again. We all became
buddies, not the best of buddies, but buddies, to be sure. Anyway, ain't much to be
disillusioned with. Boss Sanderstinkton died before I was even born.
Do you like being a hero? If so, what is the most rewarding part? If not, what makes
you keep doing it? I'm kinda new at it, but I'd say it's a pretty good gig. People
like you more when you try to do good, I've noticed.
Is there anything that would make you give up hero work, or even switch sides? Gee,
I dunno. I just got started doing this whole hero thing. Why would I want to give it up so
What are your short term goals (what would you like to be doing within a year)?
I'll probably do what I usually do. Race, wrassle, drink, maybe enter into a pie-eating
contest or two. Oh, and beat up bad guys. Gotta do that now that I'm on the straight and
What are your long term goals (what would you like to be doing twenty years from now)?
Long-term? Eh... Guess I gotta get married and have kids at some point, but besides
that, I ain't really thought that far ahead.
What is your greatest fear? Why? What do you do when something triggers this fear?
And why would I tell you something like that? You think blabbing my greatest fear to the
whole universe is a good idea? I've done some fool-headed things, but I'm not THAT fool-
Is there anything you would give you life for? I'd give my life for my family if I
How do you feel about money and material wealth? Do you desire it or disdain it? Are
you miserly with what you have, or do you like to share? Is it a mark of success, or a
means to an end? Hey, who doesn't desire money? Money's pretty good. I don't really
see it as the end all, be all mark of success like SOME people, but it's nice to have when
you need it.
How do you generally treat others? Like I would want to be treated... eh, usually.
Hey, I try my best! Whatcha expect?
Are you a trusting person? Has your trust ever been abused? I trust anyone unless I
have good reason to believe they are untrustworthy or they stab me in the back.
Are you introverted (shy and withdrawn) or extroverted (outgoing)? Do you have a lot of
self-confidence? Oh, I'm not shy. Just 'cause I don't have enough friends to shake a
stick at doesn't mean I'm shy. I just got lots of personality is all.
How do you act around attractive, available members of your preferred sex? Why do
you ask? Is there someone nearby? Does my hair look all right? What's the fella look like?
What are your most annoying habits? I don't got any annoying habits. You calling me
annoying? You wanna tell me why you think that before I punch your face in? Hm? Huh?
Do you feel contempt for any general category of people? Who are they, and why?
Snobs. Can't stand them.
What is your favorite food? Do you prefer any particular type of food? Do you take the
time to enjoy your food, or do you eat as fast as you can? The greasier the better! I
eat pretty fast. Got things to do, you know.
What is your favorite drink (alcoholic or otherwise)? Ever had an Andromeda Ab-
Burner? Oooh-eee, it's some strong stuff, lemme tell you.
What is your favorite treat (dessert)? PIE! Ain't nothing better than a good old-
fashioned pie, and that ain't no lie.
Are there any specific foodstuffs that you find disgusting or refuse to eat?
Spinbagus. I wouldn't feed that stuff to my ex-boyfriend, and I HATE my ex-boyfriend.
What is your favorite color? Are there any colors you dislike? Pink, green, black,
metal. Metal's a color, right?
What sort of music do you like? Is there any that you hate? Harvoni Rock is where
it's at. Shame it's not very popular in most star systems.
If you have a favorite scent, what is it? I like the smell of mud and hog fuel.
Do you have a favorite animal? Harvoni Hogs. Mighty big shame they're all extinct,
but their memory lives on.
What is your most treasured possession? Why? See this belt? I won this belt at my
first-ever wrestling competition. It's also one of the few things I have left from
Do you enjoy "roughing it", or do you prefer your creature comforts? I sure as
Sanderstinkton enjoy roughing it. That's the best way to do it.
Is there a job or a task you would absolutely refuse to do? Well, that depends.
What do you need doing, and how badly does it need done?
Do you consider yourself a spiritual person? If so, how do your beliefs affect your
life?How important is it to you? Not big on spirits and stuff. It's hard enough living
now, so I don't see why I should be thinking about living after what happens here.
Was your faith influenced or molded by anyone special? Nope.
If you belong to a religious organization, how often do you attend? Do you have a
specific place of worship, or friends within the organization? How much do you agree with
the beliefs of your organization? Nope.
Could you kill? Have you killed? Don't think I could. Killing is mighty permanent
for most folks.
What circumstances led to you forming that conviction, or taking that action? You
need circumstances for that? Is there a blackhole sucking in your skull? What kinda crazed
weeblenut starts out not knowing it's not okay to go around killing folks?
Are there circumstances under which you believe it is permissible to kill? What are
they? Uhhhhhh... I certainly can't think of any.
How would you react to watching someone kill another person? Would your reaction be
different if the killer was a friend or an enemy of yours? What in tardriftan kinda
question is this? I'd try to stop them, of course! And if I couldn't stop them, I'd...
ah... I, ah... don't rightly know what I'd do, but I'd figure out something!
How would you react if something important was stolen from you? I'd be raising all
Sanderstinkton trying to get my stuff back!
How would you react to public humiliation? They dropped the charges! I didn't do
nothing; quit asking about it!
How would you react if a good friend or relative were purposely or accidentally killed?
Has it happened to you? That'd be awful. Wait... you aren't threatening me, are you?
'Cause, if you are, I don't got any problems putting you in a world of hurting.
What do you consider to be the worst crime someone could commit and why? I guess
the killing thing probably.
If your life were to end in 24 hours, what five things would you do in those remaining
hours? You know something I don't?
Career & Training
Do you have any special training in your hero skills? If so, where and how did you get
it? Learned all of my fighting and hog-racing skills from my uncles.
Who taught you the most about your heroing abilities? What was your relationship with
that person? Err, well, I haven't been using my abilities for heroing for very long,
so, does that makes me self-taught?
Do you have any particularly unusual skills? How did you acquire them? Unusual?
Do you do something besides hero work for a living? Have you ever done anything else,
or do you plan to? I didn't think you could make a living doing hero work. Most hero-
types do that kinda thing for free, don't they? I'm sure I make aplenty wrestling and
What is your preferred combat style? Wrestling my foe to the ground and making them
cry like a baby scrayvesp.
Have you ever received any awards or honours? Gee, that sure would be something
nice, wouldn't it? I'm gonna get me some awards and honors soon, I hope!
What skill areas would you like most to improve in? Is there anything you can't do that
you wish desperately you could? I could always be a better wrestler and a little bit
more mechanical know-how sure would be mighty helpful.
How do you act around people who are more skilled than you in areas you'd like to
improve? Are you jealous, or do you try and learn? Can't I be a little of both?
Lifestyle & Hobbies
What is a normal day for you? How do you feel when something interrupts this routine?
Well, first thing I do is wake up at whatever place I'd done crashed at the last
night. Then, I do some lady-like things, get dressed, and eat me a big breakfast. Then, I
do some exercises to keep me loose, and then I go out and ride around and see what's
happening and maybe stop and get a bite to eat somewhere. Then, I ride some more... uh...
I pretty much count on the fact that my routine is gonna be interrupted. Routines are
kinda boring, you know?
Do you have any hobbies, or interests outside hero work? What are they, and where did
you pick them up? You really should get that goshinfluff in your ear-holes looked at.
What do you do for fun? Next question.
Do you have a costume? What does it look like? This is my costume.
How do you normally dress when not in costume? This is what I normally wear.
What do you wear to bed most nights? Getting a bit nosy, now, aren't we? Ain't none
of your business what I wear in bed.
Do you wear any special jewelry? What is it, and what does it look like? Nope.
Do you have a special place where you keep your valuables? I gots one of them there
pocket dimensions where I keep my hog. Ain't nobody getting to it but me.
What's your preferred means of local travel? How about long distance? They ain't
calling me Hogrider on Earth for nothing.
Have you ever made a will, or tried to make arrangements for your death? What
provisions did you make? I ain't planning on dying anytime soon.
If your features were to be destroyed beyond recognition, is there any other way of
identifying your body? Eh, this got a bit grim pretty quick, didn't it? I don't
rightly know how I'd be identified.
What would you like to be remembered for after your death? I'd like to be
remembered all fondly-like.
Do you believe you pose a threat to the public? Why or why not? Not anymore I
don't. I'm on the straight and narrow now, and that ain't no lie.
What do you perceive as your greatest strength? Just my strength. My body strength,
my strength of mind, my strength of character. I'm as strong as they come.
What do you perceive as your greatest weakness? Like I'm going to tell anyone that!
As a player, if you could, what advice would you give your character? Speak as if she
were sitting right here in front of you. Use proper tone so she might heed your advice...
Gingerbread: Thinking things through a little more really wouldn't hurt anything,
Lulu: Ain't nobody got time for that.
Gingerbread: Don't you think you're being a little too stubborn?
Lulu: Nope. I'm fine just the way I am.
Gingerbread: Ah. I see trying to give you advice is going to be pointless, then, like with
every other character I've ever created. Well, good luck!
Lulu: Gee, you sure got some nerve there acting all high and mighty with me. I ain't did
nothing to you.