The Straw Death [IC]

[N/A]

"Aye, we will grant this 'doctor' a chance to explain herself before drawing steel."

Before Cannonade reached for the door, Thrude caught his arm. "If she is a sorceress as the three warriors claimed, then we must stay vigilant. Keep a close eye not only upon ourselves, but each other as well. I've dealt with her ilk before. Her spells may make us see things which aren't there, or differently from how they truly are. She may try to turn us against one another. If she tricks me into dishonoring myself or breaking my oaths, then my trusty blade will fall to the ground, and I will no sooner wield it than I will pry a mountain up from the ground. Should such a fate befall me, you may have to take up arms in my stead. If she fails to cloud your mind to Right and Wrong, then Vendrvapn will no doubt prove light as a feather in your grasp." She waved a thumb up over her shoulder, toward the enormous battle axe strapped to her back.

[trollthumper]

"Okay, then," Cannonade said. "'Sides, last thing I wanted to do was risk tripping an alarm and explaining all this to the cops. And like you said, I start to go cross-eyed, hit me in the back of the helmet with that axe -- lightly, of course. Last thing I want to do is go on a rampage."

Cannonade rang the door bell. A nearby intercom, somewhat undetectable in the half-light, buzzed to life. "Who's calling?" said the voice from the intercom. It was warm yet clipped, with a hint of a Scandinavian accent.

"Your neighborhood superheroes," said Cannonade. "We ran into some of your patients. They really need some help."

The intercom went silent. As Cannonade prepared to go back and make sure she wasn't running out the back, the door flung open... and there stood a woman with pale blond hair, the looks of a supermodel, and the warmth of an ice sculpture. To Thrude, the woman looked rather familiar indeed, a face she hadn't seen in a very long time - Gunnr, one of the valkyries, who rode with Rota and Skuld to carry the dead off to Valhalla.

"What's happened?" she said, her voiced tinged with something like concern. "What did they do? Are they --" She froze as she finally noticed Thrude standing next to Cannonade, and her face was torn between feigned concern and honest joy. "Can it be...?"

[N/A]

"Spear-Sister..." Thrude was struck speechless for a few moments, just staring wide-eyed at her fellow Valkyrie. Then her face hardened into a scowl, and her massive battle axe leapt into her hand, sending sparks crackling down her body. She thrust it menacingly toward Gunnr. "The Master-Mage himself told me of our pantheon's banishment from this realm! Prove to me this is not another of the Traitor's illusions, or justify your breaking of the All-Father's decree, or I shall cut you down where you stand! I will not be fooled again!"

[trollthumper]

Gunnr's expression rapidly shifted from joy to surprise. "Sister, believe me, I am no trick," she said, "no false face, no specter, no illusion. It is true that the Pact sealed us away from all but our worshippers, and that the All-Father ordered all his children to remain in Asgard after the duplicity of the Nazis. But he knew that we still had a duty to perform. The Pact has always been... lax, on the matter of bearers of the dead. Psychopomps are allowed passage to Midgard for our duties."

"Yeah, but it looks like you're setting up shop," Cannonade said. "As for your soldiers, they went charging in to fight the Yellow Kings. The Kings had some mojo behind them. We got them out, but they're lucky they didn't get offered up to whatever the hell it is the Kings followed."

"Damn," said Gunnr, slapping her forehead. "I should have told them to be more selective of their targets."

[N/A]

Thrude raised the brow over her good eye and scrutinized her fellow Valkyrie for a few tense seconds after her protest. Then she hefted Vendrvapn into the air...and hurled it down at the floor. The blade split the floorboard. The haft vibrated briefly in the air. By the time it came to rest, Thrude was already embracing her former comrade. "Sister Gunnr! In these last few weeks, I'd lost hope for ever again seeing a familiar face!" She hugged Gunnr tightly, kissed her on the cheek, then pulled back half a step, grasping Gunnr's biceps. "You look well! After my father's disgrace, I didn't think any more warriors of Midgard would accept a place among the einherjar!"

[trollthumper]

"It is true that the einherjar are... not what they were," said Gunnr, notes of bitterness working their way into her words. "The slain more often seek comfort in the arms of the martyr than in the halls of Valhalla. A few of the Thule -- " She almost spat the word out. " -- found their way into Folkvangr through the bonds of faith and promise... but you should see them run on the fields when the day's battle begins." A frightening smile crossed her lips. "It is like seeing a lamed deer try to run from a pack of wolves."

"Y'know, as happy as I am to see Nazis get theirs," Cannonade said, "what the hell do you think you're doing? You're talking these guys into suicide. They've got friends, family, people who'd miss 'em. You're not helping them with their problems, you're telling them to embrace 'em."

"'Problems'?" Gunnr said, locking eyes with Cannonade. "Their only problem is that the world has moved on from them. In an earlier time -- in our time -- they would take the field once more. Battle would be their bread; conquest would be their drink. They would not be thrown aside, like a broken shield, the minute the first cracks began to appear. Their term of service would be for life, not for a period that rips combat away just as the taste had been acquired."

"The world's changed. Most of these guys fight as long as they need to, not as long as there's war in the world. Just because the government falls down for them doesn't mean they need to throw themselves back into the battlefield."

"It's not the government that fails them. It's the way of war that fails them."

[N/A]

Thrude sighed as she released her former comrade from her embrace. "I have heard much of these Thule-Gesellschaft dogs since my return to Midgard. I can only hope that they were cast down into Hel at the first opportunity. If they were not, then in my absence, the honor of my people has sunk even lower than I'd originally thought. And that is a thought I honestly don't think I could bare."

The goddess turned back and forth between superhero and Valkyrie. "I don't understand. Why would able-bodied soldiers such as these be tossed aside like soaked rags? I know that Midgard enjoys an unprecedented age of peace and prosperity, and that its warriors are not held in as high regard as in times past. But I also know it faces no shortage of those with strong arm and weak character, who seek to take that which is not theirs."

"Surely there are other causes in need of a sturdy sword-arm! Is not the city watch always complaining of being outnumbered? Are there not even mercenary companies in the more contentious parts of the realm which warriors such as these could sign on with? How could they be so desperate for purpose, in death or in life, that they would throw themselves away, body and soul, against a foe they had no hope of defeating? Such a thing is the greatest honor any warrior can aspire to, if it serves the greater good. Otherwise, it is mere folly."

[trollthumper]

Gunnr shook her head. "There are many such causes, sister," said the valkyrie, "but the men leading these causes fear when the sword arm sees fit to swing. They fear that these men might fall back into the rhythm of battle and act accordingly in a situation where it might be deemed inappropriate. They fear that the man accustomed to battle will fall back into its rhythm. The reason these men have come to me is because no one else can help them."

"They came to you because they needed help," said Cannonade. "They wanted to deal with everything they left behind on the battlefield, and you brought it screaming back. They came to you because they couldn't get rid of the urges, and you just decided to dig them back up!"

Gunnr stared daggers at Cannonade. "Hold your tongue, child," she said. "I have seen the ways of war since the forging of the world, and shall until the day it shakes from Yggdrasil like an overripe fruit. War is in the blood of these men, and the world tries to chain them down."

[N/A]

Thrude glanced back and forth between the superhero and the Valkyrie several times. She lacked the sophistication to consciously understand how each was a symbol, one for her old life, her old ways, the other for the new. She lacked even the vocabulary to express such an idea. She would have been hard-pressed to explain the conflict raging in her soul during those tense moments of silence.

"Our mortal followers sailed and sacked and burned and pillaged and slaughtered because they had to. They eked out a grim existence in a merciless, desolate wasteland, living always on the edge of a knife. But today, they have created for themselves a paradise, one in the very image of Asgard itself. They have finally understood the wisdom my grandfather tried for so long to guide them toward: War is a means to an end, not an end unto itself. Fighting to secure freedom, peace, life itself, these things mean something. But fighting just to fight means nothing."

"The mortals finally understand that, and yet you do not. Spear-Sister, in the name of The All-Father, I hereby relieve you of your duties in Midgard. You. Are. Dismissed."

[trollthumper]

Gunnr's will, so strong moments ago, withered in the face of Thrude's invective. "Sister," she said, "you don't understand. War will always be with humanity, no matter for what reason. Our followers understood that; it's the men of today who don't. They think you can just put it down when it's not in use, like a plow or a hammer. It's too vital, too strong -- it lives and breathes on its own. What these leaders do is like exposing a man to ambrosia and then asking him to starve. It can't be done."

"It can," Cannonade said. "Lots of soldiers are able to separate the field and the homefront. Some guys may need help to do it, but that's what they need - help. You think these men are broken? You're breaking them. They don't need another fight -- and if they do need one, they need to fight for the cause, not because it's a fast trip to martyrdom. So I'm with Thrude on this one." He leaned forward. "Take the next trip back to Asgard. Get out of town. And don't try this crap ever again."

Gunnr sighed. "I suppose I shall return to Bifrost..." Just as Cannonade began to relax, however, the valkyrie drove a mailed fist into his midsection. Pain shot up through him as the woman's robe faded away in place of armor. "...when I have brought my men back with me! I will not abandon my sacred duty!"

[trollthumper]

"Wow," said Cannonade, sarcasm dripping like honey. "And here I thought you were so reasonable." He took Gunnr's blow, and swiftly regained his footing. "You really aren't gonna stop until you've broken everyone around you just so you can feel good about yourself, huh?" He drove his fist right into Gunnr's chest... and watched in disbelief as a blow that could've made concrete explode did nothing against her chest.

"Broken? No, mortal." Gunnr swept the back of her hand across Cannonade's face with the force of thunder, sending the hero flying out into the street. "Whole? Yes. They will see glory in the fields of Volkfangr, and find themselves once more in the clashing of swords and the crack of bullets." She stepped forward from the house, the moonlight catching her armor. "The only thing I shall break tonight... is you."

[N/A]

The blocky striking surfaces of Thrude's gigantic double-headed warhammer flattened into blades, like mithril butterfly wings spreading out from the ebony haft. "I thought merely to strip you of your station for your foolishness, Spear-Sister. Must I slay you for your treason as well?"

Electricity leaked out from the goddess's burning blue eye as she thrust Vendrvapn toward the ceiling. A pillar of azure lightning sliced through the sky, burned holes through the roof of the townhouse and every floor above her, and poured down through those holes like a waterfall. The rogue Valkyrie managed to sidestep her former comrade's elemental lackey, but undaunted, the lightning continued to dart rapidly back and forth across the room like a striking cobra. It ricocheted in a zig-zag pattern from wall to wall to ceiling to floor and back again in the blink of an eye, leaving scorched craters in its wake as it chased Gunnr. When its path sent it flying toward Thrude, the bolts forked in twain to avoid striking their mistress.

"You are a servant of Freyja. I am The Daughter of Storms! Do you honestly think to stand against the Princess of Asgard?!"

[trollthumper]

The lightning rained down around Gunnr, but she stood undaunted. "I will stand against anyone," she said, "god or mortal, to deliver the glorious dead to their final rest! Sister, I am sorry for your delusions. You have been lost, beyond even the eyes of Heimdall, in some place dread and secret for ages. The toll it must have taken on you -- "

"Glass houses." Cannonade pulled himself up from the pavement and charged at Gunnr in a running tackle, slamming her into the door frame of the townhouse with enough force to dent the stone wall. "Big stones. You've got some nerve, calling her nuts."

Gunnr studied Cannonade. "I sense battle in your blood, child," she said, "and yet you speak of peace. You are like a sword, left rusting in a blacksmith's shop." She turned to Thrude. "And sister... you may command the lightning..."

The valkyrie slammed her hands together. Everything turned white as the doorframe - and a good three feet of house around it - exploded with a thunderclap. Cannonade was rocked back into the hallway, stumbling for balance.

"...but I speak with the voice of THUNDER!"

[N/A]

The Nordic goddess threw up her arm to shield her face against the Valkyrie's onslaught. A cerulean blow flared up from the runes engraved into her mithril mail as the shockwave slammed into her. It failed to leave so much as a scratch on Thrude's armor, but it sliced gashes into the dyed leathers and linens covering her arms and legs between the plates. She staggered backward a few inches, her leather boots sliding backward across what remained of the floor.

The bolt of avenging lightning Thrude had unleashed continued to wreak havoc throughout the house, burning one hole after another. But Gunnr continued to duck and weave at just the right moments to avoid it.

[N/A]

The Daughter of Storms swung her massive battle axe with reckless abandon, howling with fury as it chopped crescents through walls and furniture alike, anything unfortunate enough to find itself standing for even a second between her and her former comrade.

"You are strong of body, Sister! Strong as ever! But you are weak of spirit! The same weakness that begat my father's disgrace! You think my exile destroyed my mind? I've learned more in a month from these new champions of Midgard than you've learned in a thousand years! They know what 'courage' and 'wisdom' truly mean even if you have forgotten! You dishonor our sisterhood with your foolishness!"

[trollthumper]

"Dishonor?!?" shouted Gunnr with the force of the storm. "Me?!? No, dear sister, I have done my duty! This world has forgotten us, abandoned us. After what the Thule did, the All-father thought he could just sit on his throne and hide from the world. I have spoken to men and sung of our glory!"

"Which bit?" After picking himself up, Cannonade came at Gunnr hard; he wasn't able to punch through her defenses, but he was able to bring her to the ground with a tug. "The bit where the Nazis dishonored you guys? Or the bit where the crazy goddess sends guys into the meat grinder for the sake of her own ego?"

Gunnr was able to break Cannonade's hold quickly. She hefted the hero up and tossed him into the nearby door frame, causing the nearby wall to break. "You seek a warrior's death, hero?" she said mockingly. "I cannot promise you the finest treatment at Folkvangr, but at least you'll have a step up on the scum!"

[N/A]

Without pause, Thrude shouted her arguments at the top of her lungs as she traded swings with her fellow Valkyrie. "Babes do not abandon their fathers when they dare to walk upon their own feet! They do not abandon their mothers when they drink mead brewed by their own hand instead of milk from her teat! The mortals did not abandon us, Spear-Sister! They learned and they grew! You would have them continue to crawl when they could stand!"

The Daughter of Storms sprang backward as she swung, causing her massive axe to fall short of its target. But with a twitch of her wrist and an ounce of extra pressure from her thumb, the ebony haft of Vendrvapn surged forward by half its length, closing the distance and then some. At the same time, the double-bladed head pulled up and inflated into the shape of a giant blocky hammer, fractions of a second before smashing into Gunnr's ribs. The hammer blow knocked the Valkyrie up off her feet and sent her flying into the townhouse wall. The impact shattered every window on that side of the room, and the masonry split and cracked in all directions from the point of impact.

[N/A]

Thrude glared down at her fallen foe, and the strips of electricity flashing and crawling across her body glowed brighter and flowed faster, until they nearly obscured the goddess entirely. The humming and crackling rushed to a crescendo, then stopped entirely, as did all sound in the house. For a few seconds, everything appeared to move in slow motion. Cannonade could feel every hair on his body stand on end, smell the faint ionization of the air grow thick and pungent. The thermostat on the wall showed the temperature drop thirty degrees in an instant. Cannonade could see his breath form pockets of mist in front of his face. Then he could see nothing at all, as a brilliant white light glowed outside, so huge and so bright that it seemed to come from every direction at once, pouring in from every window, every crack and hole in the walls.

Then the dam broke, and everything came rushing back in. Most of the cracked wall standing behind the battered, kneeling Valkyrie vanished. A bolt of lightning easily four meters in diameter punched down at a 45-degree angle through the front of the townhouse, sending charred splinters of half-melted floorboards and drywall flying in all directions.